Its always good to reflect back on how you talk to people and how they talk to you, to build a better communication skill over time.
I was thinking lately about an incident that occurs to me from time to time. where I don't feel comfortable sharing my opinion about a certain thing in front of certain people. but, I feel more comfortable in front of other people.
I started decomposing the situation in my head into pieces, and not to bore you with the details. I realized that I don't do that in front of the people who usually tend to correct me a lot or try to adjust my decisions with what they think makes more sense.
Then it hit me, that the people around me who I try to tell what they should choose makes sense or not (even if I say in my opinion) might tend to not feel very confident around me, because of my loud thoughts about their opinions.
What I Realized That Happens
People should not be intervening with people around them. Especially, the close ones like brothers/sisters or close friends. Because, the more you interfere with their decisions, the less confident they become. It makes them think twice before they say anything around you, hence, makes them less confident about their decision.
What I Realized Must Be Done
The proposed decision is that you wait for them to build enough confidence. So, that when you say something around them, they can actually challenge you back feeling confident enough that their opinion matters as much as yours with what they’re going to speak out.
Actions To Do (when they’re not super confident around you)
- Wait for them to propose their opinion
- If you think the outcome of their opinion won't hurt them then leave them to take it and if there is something to learn let them learn it themselves.
- Never make fun of their opinions, this will demolish any chance of them feeling better about their decisions.
- Know for a fact that other people are as smart as you are, they just think differently.
- Know that you only need to correct them because either you know for a fact that their decision will hurt them, or because you think your thinking is better (which is wrong)
Hope this made you deal with people around you better.